Do you lie?

Do you lie? … What are you thinking of? Most of us do, including me. (Though not always). Some situations compel me to lie. Like if I am in no position to say “No” to someone but at same time I don’t want to do what he/she is insisting, I lie, to get out of that situation. I don’t enjoy doing that. I will call it “self induced, forced lying”, (Don’t blindly assume that this quote is having a deep philosophical meaning or don’t try to justify it. This term just came in my mind, may be a stupid or may be logical, whatever. I propose this as a new category of liars). I relate “Self induced, forced lying” to the lazy or weak or super humble nature. I am more of lazy (when it comes to dealing with my friends, in fact I am lazy (moody) at everything) and bit of super humble (when I deal with elders or strangers). I seldom lie to my parents but that doesn’t necessarily mean that I am strong enough to confess my misdoing. I behave “near perfect” and don’t get into situations where I have to lie. I play safe ;) But if I get embroiled in misdoings, many a time, sadly, I lie. It is hard to remain perfect with everyone, I mean you cannot make everyone happy, some point of time you start thinking of yourself, you tend to become self centric. Being self centric and super humble at same time is a sorry situation. You have no option other than bowing down or lying.

I have come across few really amazing people. They never lie, at least not in front of me (And I don’t lie them). They are fearless; they don’t shy to say “No”, no matter to whom they have to, they are people with strong personality. I really love, admire these people. According to me the best way to choose your friends/partners is not to see if they are true to you but to see if they are true to ‘Others’. Let us categorize this ‘Others’. At bottom of the ladder sit parents, then close relatives (genuine closeness & not inherited closeness). After that, friends then relatives (inherited) and on top of the ladder sit strangers. Let us call it ‘Ladder of truthfulness’. A partner/friend you are looking for should at least be true to his/her parents. The more he/she goes up on ‘Ladder of truthfulness’ the more ideal person he is. But before desiring such people you should apply this ladder test on yourself. “Don’t desire if you don’t deserve”. I find my climb shaky from 1st step itself, 95 times, out of hundred, I am true to my parents. Not good enough. Rachel, in one of the F.R.I.E.N.D.S. episode said (to Ross) “Once a cheater always a cheater”, its true. But honestly, I am striving to achieve 100%.

I really really hate people who lie (hating others is also sign of a weak personality, but then I will be sitting next to god if I stop hating each and every person) but sometimes I find my self in same situation. I am trying hard not to get into that so that I can wholeheartedly hate such people. “Lage Raho Munna Bhai” acted as catalyst to these beliefs. I saw it twice because I was not able to understand it properly. Good job Mr Rajkumar Hirani. I never hated Gandhiji but at same time he was not my hero. After watching this movie I have developed kind of respect for him. His single point formula to succeed in life was quite simple, “Speak Truth”. I think this is a master key to all problems in life, at same time toughest thing to do. Other things like “Hard Work”, “Dedication” etc etc are derivatives of this virtue (virtue of truthfulness). You need to be strong to speak truth; if you are true to yourself you will readily realize/accept your mistakes, your weaknesses. Once you realize them you will definitely strive to correct them and Bingo! Suddenly you will realize that you are doing “Hard Work” with “Dedication” to achieve your goals that will give you feeling of satisfaction. Your personal satisfaction will make you more confident which will make you a charming or even amazing person. See! Just by being true to yourself you have become a charming person. Now why do we lie others? There may be many reasons. I won’t list them here. But in a nutshell, reason of lying is that either we like but fear them or we don’t like but are still dependent on them. Speaking truth in former case will make you fearless. Initially you will be at receiving end but gradually you will end up winning them. Speaking truth in later case will make you strong and independent. Why do you need people you don’t like? Be strong enough to shun them. (Now this thing is hard to do when you are humble in nature, this is a case with me ;) )

Now you might be wondering from where I learned this. No I didn’t read any “Do not lie” book. This is what I have observed from my surroundings. I am privileged to have company of some wonderful people who unintentionally made me realize this. These are just thoughts that are making rounds in my mind for a while, I am not necessarily practicing each and every thing I mentioned, but honestly, I intend to. I am at 25 and intend to carry my self till 75 (at least). I still have 50 years to learn. So there will be revisions to my beliefs that I stated above (I hope core remains same). So don’t blindly believe or oppose what I have written. Try reasoning it. And discuss it. All suggestions/appreciations/criticism are welcomed.

And guys, Have you heard of ‘sitemeter’? Scroll bottom and you will see one counter. This counter not only gives me the number of visits but it also gives me loads of details of that visit. With small readership my blog has, I can very surely guess who had visited my blog. Now if you go out without dropping comment I will catch you. So please comment dude! It makes me happy.